Consider this: Have you ever stopped to ask yourself why you fight with your spouse? Seriously, what is the source of arguing and fighting with each other? In all probability, when you fight, you aren’t trying to meet the needs of your spouse. James makes it clear that fights and quarrels are not the result of conditions or environment, but from evil in the human heart. Instead of looking to God to give us joy and satisfaction, we look to others, often our spouses, to make us happy. When they fail us, which they do, we become angry.

The solution is forgiveness. We must humble ourselves before God and the one we have offended. The issue is more than restoring good feelings or happiness. We must understand the purpose of forgiveness. Christ satisfies the demands of justice and the cries of the heart for mercy. Forgiveness enables you to enjoy fellowship first with God and then with your spouse.

Do you feel like you can’t forgive? Jesus offered forgiveness to those who jeered Him on the cross. His response was, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34 KJV). As Christians, God calls us to be reconciled to one another—especially to those who are closest to us. Take the high road of maturity and be a reconciler. A willingness to make up after a disagreement is central to a satisfying relationship.

Discuss: Are you prepared to “stick together” and get through crisis situations? How can you be more prepared to “hang in there” when the going gets tough?

God has two dwellings:
one in heaven, and the other in a meek and thankful heart.
IZAAK WALTON (1593–1683)

Building Relationships Across Nations | Bringing Christ to the Home